Why the School Holidays Can Be Difficult for Some Young People

For some families, the school holidays are something to look forward to. They can bring opportunities to relax, spend time together and take a break from the pressures of school.

However, for many children and young people, the holidays can also be surprisingly challenging.

At Thriving Young Minds, we support young people who experience anxiety, low mood, trauma and emotional dysregulation, many of whom are neurodivergent. We often hear from parents that they worry about the school holidays and the impact on their children. While every young person’s experience is unique, this time can present challenges that affect emotional wellbeing in ways that aren’t always obvious.

Understanding why this happens can help parents and carers respond with empathy and provide the support their child needs.

The Change in Routine

School provides structure, predictability and familiarity. Even if a young person finds school difficult, they usually know what each day will look like. When the holidays begin, that routine suddenly changes. Sleeping patterns shift, activities become less predictable, friends may be away and there is often much more unstructured time.

For some young people, particularly those who experience anxiety or who are neurodivergent, this uncertainty can feel overwhelming. Others may simply struggle with the transition from one routine to another. Having a few predictable parts to the day, such as regular mealtimes, a daily walk or an evening routine, can help create a sense of security without making the holidays feel overly structured.

School Can Be Exhausting

Many young people spend the school term managing academic expectations, navigating friendships and coping with social pressures. Some are also working incredibly hard to hide how overwhelmed they feel.

For autistic young people, this may involve masking, others may simply spend the school day trying to manage anxiety, difficult emotions or stressful situations. When the holidays arrive, the pressure eases, but so does the energy they’ve been using to cope.

Parents may notice:

Increased emotions
More time spent alone
Greater irritability
Low motivation
Wanting to sleep more

Rather than assuming something is wrong, this can sometimes be a sign that their mind and body are finally beginning to recover.

More Time Can Mean More Worries

During term time, school keeps young people busy. When the holidays arrive, they often have more time to think. This can allow worries that have been sitting in the background to become much louder.

These worries might include:

Transitions
Friendships
Returning to school
Exams
Family difficulties
Identity

Young people don’t always have the words to explain what they’re feeling.

Instead, emotions may show themselves through behaviour such as withdrawing, becoming argumentative, losing motivation or appearing unusually emotional.

Behaviour is communication, and looking beneath it with curiosity can often tell us far more than the behaviour itself.

Holidays Can Be Overwhelming Too

Although holidays are meant to be enjoyable, they often involve busy attractions, travelling, family gatherings and changes to everyday routines. These experiences can be exciting, but they can also be physically and emotionally draining.

Young people who experience sensory differences, including many neurodivergent children, find noisy, crowded or unfamiliar environments particularly overwhelming. Equally, children who have experienced trauma or struggle with anxiety may also find these situations difficult.

Allowing breaks, respecting boundaries and recognising when your young person has had enough can help prevent overwhelm.

Social Media Doesn’t Take a Holiday

While school may stop, social media rarely does. Seeing photos of holidays, parties or friendship groups can leave some young people feeling isolated or as though they’re missing out. It’s important to remind young people that social media usually shows carefully selected highlights rather than everyday reality.

Encouraging time away from screens and creating opportunities for genuine connection can make a positive difference.

Trauma Can Make Change Feel Unsafe

For young people who have experienced trauma or significant life changes, routine often provides a sense of safety. When that routine disappears, feelings of uncertainty can increase. Some young people become more emotional or reactive. Others may become quieter, withdraw from family activities or seem disconnected.

Neither response is “bad behaviour”, they may simply be signs that a young person’s nervous system is working hard to keep them safe. Responding with calmness, consistency and compassion can help them feel more secure.

The Pressure to Have the “Perfect Summer”

Many parents feel pressure to create magical holidays filled with exciting trips and memorable experiences. The reality is that children don’t need perfection. What they remember most is feeling safe, connected and accepted.

Some of the most meaningful moments happen during everyday activities:

Playing a board game
Going for a walk
Watching a favourite film
Baking together
Having a picnic

How You Can Support Your Young Person

There is no one-size-fits-all approach, but these simple strategies can help:

Keep some familiar routines where possible
Prepare them for changes in plans
Balance busy activities with quiet time
Encourage rest after a demanding school term
Respect sensory and emotional needs
Offer choices to help them feel more in control

Most importantly, remember that every young person is different. Comparing them to siblings, friends or social media expectations rarely helps.

When Additional Support May Help

If your child seems persistently anxious, withdrawn, overwhelmed or unhappy during the holidays, it may be a sign that they would benefit from additional support.

At Thriving Young Minds, we provide counselling for children and young people experiencing emotional difficulties, trauma, anxiety and the challenges that can come with being neurodivergent.

Our trauma-informed and neuro-affirming approach recognises that behaviour is a form of communication. We work alongside young people to help them understand their emotions, build resilience and develop strategies that allow them to feel more confident and connected.

By responding with understanding rather than expectation, we can help young people feel safe enough to recharge, grow and return to school with greater confidence.

If you’re worried about your child or simply need someone to talk things through with, Thriving Young Minds is here to help.

Alternatively, you could get extra support from:

Young Minds Parents’ Helpline

Save the Children – School Holiday Support

Mind – Supporting Parents in the School Holidays

Holiday Activities Fund

Resources for families | Children’s Commissioner for England